his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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