We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
