you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
