my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
ttyl tear gas
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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