You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
