In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
420 ftw
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
