I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize