he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
