I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize