Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
