I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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