Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
zippers are such a cool invention
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
