i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
