There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
this is an emotional support booty call
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
A bitchslap is in order.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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