he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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