I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
