we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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