they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
