I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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