There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
