I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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