is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Randomize