You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I pour the whiskey from now on
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize