i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize