In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
