This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
