know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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