You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize