I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
