i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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