Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
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