Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
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