He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
