I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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