guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
