im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
