how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
