You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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