i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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