I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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