there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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