she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
