i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
He felt like a one man threesome
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
