You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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