Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
