Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
