Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
