Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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