well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Randomize
