we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
