We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
